10 years later..."the choice" - ch. 1

Several of my friends have been recording the stories of how they met/fell in love with their spouse. I didn't think I really had much to say about mine because it was all such a whirlwind but the more I thought about it, the more I realized it was really quite involved and my kids might want to read it someday.

You can read it too, if you'd like. I'm an open book. :)

Chapter 1 - "In which I was prepared for the future"

Early 1997 ~ age 17
I was sitting outside the patriarchs home. I was there to receive my patriarchal blessing and my boyfriend was with me. Even then I was fiercely independent and I didn't want anyone present with me when I got my blessing. Not even my parents. I knew it would be recorded and they could read it later.

I left my boyfriend sitting in the car and went inside. I remember it vividly. I can see the one story house, the bushes lining the front of the house, the walk going to the door. I can see the pattern on the door and I remember the smells of an old persons home when the door was opened. I remember her smile and his handshake. I remember my nerves and how the instant he placed his hands on my head, the nerves subsided and I felt peace. I listened intently because I still wasn't sure. How could someone who didn't know me offer me a blessing with counsel to take throughout my mortal life? It was during that blessing, listening to those words, that I realized it was God, not him. The words came from above, from someone who knew me better than I knew myself and they were truth.

But there was a phrase that stood out. A phrase I didn't completely understand. "choose wisely", it said. "Choose wisely" the one who you will pledge your life and eternity to. The one who you will marry in the temple of the Lord. The one who will be by your side for eternity.

"Choose?" I asked myself. What about love? What about time and investment? How could there be a choice? I'd lived my whole life hearing the story of my parents. Fell in love as teenagers, wrote through my dad's mission and were married shortly after his return. Isn't that how it works? You marry the one you put the time and effort into. Right?

I suppose, looking back, I should have known. I liked boys. I was pretty sure I was going to marry pretty much every guy I dated and I didn't really spend much time without a boyfriend. Not only that, most of my closest friends were guys.

I lived in a smallish town without many dating prospects within my religion. I knew I wanted to be married in the temple but seeing as all the LDS guys around me were my friends and nothing more, I figured I'd have to just make sure my boyfriend got baptized first. I always thought I'd marry young and couldn't see very far beyond High School in my mind.

I'd been dating a nice, Catholic boy for my whole senior year. He was a junior and his best friends were my LDS guy friends. With all that exposure I thought for sure he'd join the church and we'd be fine. He even wanted to but his mom wouldn't allow it. He talked all the time about getting baptized at 18, going on a mission at 19 and marrying me after that.

I graduated High School and suddenly, I became stifled. I'm a spontaneous person and I couldn't breathe with all the planning of my future going on. I didn't know what I wanted (I've always been terrible at planning very far in advance) but I knew he wasn't it. Besides, there was this guy I worked with that had his eye on me.